Previously on Drag Race: RuPaul and the other judges started getting really fucking tired of Monét X Change‘s pussycat wigs. Miz Cracker continued to flounder and not do much of anything to stand out. And Kameron Michaels and Eureka flopped, but the Tennessee Sisterhood turned it out in the lip-sync and no one went home.
The girls return to the werk room to celebrate Eureka and Kameron’s double shantay, but not everyone is feeling like pussy poppin’. Aquaria, in particular, is hella bitter that no one got eliminated and she has to sit through another challenge before they can move on to the top five.
This is particularly irritating to Aquafina, because according to her, “some people” have been skating by. Kameron Michaels knows Aquaria means her.
Asia O’Hara, the queen of sisterhood, is NOT having Aquaria’s outburst. She thinks it’s selfish AF and that really, this has nothing to do with her.
The next morning, the queens gather around the werk room table and Aquaria takes the opportunity to apologize to Kameron and Eureka for her behavior.
RuPaul comes in for this week’s mini-challenge: queens are being challenged to reverse their feminine gorgeousness and go all out with masculine man looks to model for the new men’s body spray, “Trade.”
Kameron Michaels has a very obvious advantage here, and she… uhh…
Eureka went all out with a big ol’ redneck with a country accent and horrible haircut. The transformation is pretty incredible.
Monét X Change and Asia O’Hara are having trouble being manly, which is hilarious. Aquaria and Cracker do an okay enough job at being trade-y.
And the winner of the trade contest is… Eureka!
This week’s maxi-challenge is the annual makeover challenge! This year, the queens are tasked with making gorgeous drag daughters out of six social media celebrities—some flamingly gay, and some (gasp) straight.
As the mini-challenge winner, Eureka gets to assign each social media man to a fellow queen. Based on last week’s challenge, when Ru told Aquaria she should’ve been more strategic with role-assigning, Eureka decides to go all out with the shady mismatching. So Kingsley, the one black guy in the group, doesn’t go to Monét or Asia—he goes to Aquaria.
The girls start working with their soon-to-be girls to get a sense of what they want and start teaching them the ins and outs of drag. Asia’s partner Raymond Braun, a big ol’ ‘mo, immediately falls in love with one of her elaborate sequined jackets.
Miz Cracker’s partner, Chester See, mentions an ex-girlfriend. Cracker’s deadpan reaction: “Oh, so you’re a heterosexual?”
Eureka’s makeover partner is Frankie Grande, who is as loud as he is gay. Which is very.
Meanwhile, Kameron Michaels is paired up with Anthony Padilla, another straightie. In her confessional, Kameron admits she was bullied a lot by straight guys in high school, so now she has a fear of straight people (???).
Aquaria’s partner Kingsley is worried that Aquaria may not have the tools or the makeup skills to do a person of color’s makeup. But it turns out Aquaria has given plenty of makeovers to all kinds of people over the years and is not intimidated in the least.
Ru comes in to chat it up with the queens and their victims, and girl she is feeling her oats today. I’m pretty sure Ru just had some of Alyssa Edwards’s Go-Go juice because this queen’s energy levels are out of control!
With the crazy bits of ultra-hyper advice over with, Ru announces an extra twist to the challenge: Each pair of queens must make a “homemade” video lip-syncing to Ru’s song, “Charisma, Uniqueness, Nerve, and Talent.”
The men start to get dragged up a little bit and practice walking the runway in heels.
The next day, the queens start getting their menseses in drags for the runway. Anthony Padilla asks Kameron Michaels why she does her makeup so far away from everyone else. Kameron explains she likes the solitude and gets to do her thing on her own and she enjoys it that way.
Monét’s guy, Tyler Oakley, asks Eureka what her plan was with assigning the men to the queens. Eureka responds with “leading anyone to their demise,” and Tyler quips “including yourself?” Face crack.
Miz Cracker finishes up Chester’s makeup, and she is overjoyed with her creation. So is Chester, in fact. The two of them have an adorable freakout moment in the mirror. Cracker, showing emotion? I could not believe it.
Main stage time! Ru introduces the judges and goes for her usual “Gentlemen” line, but randomly cracks up halfway through, leading to another round of “Miss Vanjie!”
Asia O’Hara and Raymond Braun, a.k.a. America O’Hara, are looking fierce with their matching jackets and thigh-high boots. Not a huge fan of the short hair on America, but they both still look great.
Eureka has made Frankie Grande into Eufreaka, an adorable little sister type who keeps wanting to get freaky but is being taught to be pageanty by her mentor. It’s a fun story.
Aquaria aimed for a royalty theme when turning Kingsley into Capricia Corn, but while the royal thing is very obvious for Aquaria, Capricia ends up looking a bit basic. Her makeup is stunning, though. Take that, Eureka!
Miz Cracker has turned sweet, straight Chester See into the sluttiest queen on the stage as Miz Cookie, who is twerking it out and feeling herself start to finish. It’s fantastic, and really hilarious.
Monét X Change is werking it out with Tyler Oakley, who has become Short Change. They look a bit basic, but at least Monét is wearing big hair. FINALLY.
Kameron Michaels and Anthony Padilla, a.k.a. Kelly Michaels, are also suffering from a bit of Basic Bitch Syndrome. Kelly looks great, but her walk is really not very graceful. That’s a man, Maury!
Next, it’s time for the dance video to Mama Ru’s song. It doesn’t do much for the judging—for the most part, it’s just extra entertaintment.
Now for the critiques: Asia and America look fierce together, Eureka and Eufreaka sold a story, and Cracker and Cookie killed it. Aquaria and Capricia are a bit mismatched. Monét and Short Change are too basic, and so are Kameron and Kelly.
The queens go kiki in the Untucked lounge, and Eureka checks in on Kameron Michaels and cheers her up after that tough critique.
Monét X Change is facing facts. She knows she’s most likely in the bottom two, and that’ll be her third time, which is usually the end for most queens. She’s accepting it. Asia O’Hara explains how she underestimated Monét originally and she was shocked by how talented Miss X Change is.
The social media queens rejoin the queens in the lounge and Eureka talks (again) about how she tried to throw Aquaria under the bus with Kingsley. But Aquaria is busy rehearsing the lip-sync song in the back, so really it turns into Eureka being shady to Kingsley.
Back on the main stage, the winner is declared: it’s Miz Cracker!
Aquaria comes close to the bottom two, but those spots are Kameron’s and Monét’s this week. The lip-sync song is “Good As Hell” by guest judge Lizzo.
Both queens do a great job selling the song, but Monét takes a big ol’ risk with a stunt that, judging by RuPaul’s face, doesn’t quite pay off.
Kameron, on the other hand, kills the song, serving up all of the attitude and nailing the lyrics. Plus, I mean, sideways split.
So between that and track records, Kameron Michaels gets to stay while Monét X Change sashays away.
Monét X Change was my top pick to win this competition before the season started, and while she did well in most challenges, she did have some unfortunate shortcomings with her lerks. Hopefully, with a bit of growth and X-tra money, Miss Monét can make it to the top someday. Bye, queen!
Let’s do that rundown!
Asia O’Hara – Asia did great this week, and she looked stun as always. I believe a top spot may be in the stars for her after all, despite her mishaps earlier in the season.
Eureka – Miss Eureka is still fully unstoppable, and may very well end up taking this crown unless she has to lip-sync for it. But cut the shady antics, girl! We get it, you’re strategic.
Aquaria – I think Aquaria is still Eureka’s biggest competition here, and the one with the most chances of taking the crown from her. She has a drive and fearlessness that I really admire.
Miz Cracker – Out of the two remaining queens who hadn’t won a challenge yet before this week, one went home and the other finally got a victory. With a challenge win under her belt and not a single lip-sync yet, Miz Cracker’s track record is suddenly looking much, much better.
Kameron Michaels – Who would’ve thought when starting out the season that Kameron Michaels would be in the top five? I am thrilled for this queen that she has beat back everyone’s expectations and is still fighting her way to the top. Werk, bitch.
Here we are, ladies. A top five with fairly balanced track records, all in all! I cannot wait to see how this season concludes. Catch y’all next time!