Previously on Drag Race: Kameron Michaels proved once and for all you shouldn’t mess with the quiet ones. Eureka was forced to relive a traumatizing experience with her knee surgery—I mean her dancing—I mean her singing. And The Vixen finally sashayed away after putting up a fierce, fierce fight.
Back in the werk room post-Vixen exit, the ladies regroup around her mirror message: “Evil triumps [sic] when good queens do nothing.” Perhaps it’s the spelling mistake, perhaps it’s a lack of culture preventing them from understanding the reference, but everyone looks super confused.
The girls discuss Kameron Michaels’s challenge win, which she’s still a bit shook about. She’s not really allowing herself to celebrate, at least not yet, and says she secretly really wanted to win this challenge but was keeping her feelings about it on the DL.
Aquaria‘s bottom three placement comes up and Miss Aquafina is in denial about it. She thinks she just happened to be safe along with the others and was simply called last by RuPaul.
A few of the queens are miffed (and maybe a little intimidated) by Aquaria’s crazy levels of confidence, including Asia O’Hara, who calls her unsportsmanlike.
The next morning, the queens get the familiar “she done already done had herses”… from an unfamiliar voice. It’s Stephen Colbert!
After Colbert’s TV skit, RuPaul comes in to introduce this week’s mini-challenge: a game of concentration, but with the Pit Crew and underwear instead of cards!
The girls get pretty darn distracted by all that azz and most of them don’t get a whole lotta matches. I can’t blame them.
Only Aquaria manages to get more than a single match.
As a reward for winning the mini-challenge, Aquaria gets to assign the roles in the upcoming acting maxi-challenge: a scripted skit inspired by the amazing TV show, Westworld!
In an attempt to get back into some “sportsmanlike” behavior, Aquaria decides to have a conversation with everyone and open the floor for the girls to pick their own parts rather than assigning them. What they decide the parts on, however, is a list of characters with basic descriptions rather than the actual script. So several of them, Aquaria included, realize they’ve picked huge parts on accident or, on the contrary, tiny-ass little roles that will be hard to shine with.
Mama Ru pops back into the werk room as everyone is learning their lines and getting their costumes ready to dole out some advice and psych the queens out, because nothing makes good TV like paranoia.
Monét X Change gets a visit from Ru and the two discuss Monét’s underwhelming runway looks. RuPaul brings up the pussycat wigs again and very strongly encourages Monét to bring more big hair to the main stage because she needed to show a voluminous, glamorous look, like, yesterday.
Ru checks in with Asia O’Hara, reminding her of both her Snatch Game / Cher failures and her wins in recent weeks. She gives Asia an honest, encouraging, tough love kind of pep talk: “You’re a champion, girl. Remember who the hell you are.”
Lastly, Ru speaks with Miz Cracker who, despite a strong start in the competition, has still not won any challenges. Most of her acting performances, which are supposed to be her strong suit, have been really stiff and unentertaining so far. Ru suggests Cracker may be relying too heavily on jokes she has set up in her head and is refusing to let go and open up. She tells her, quite simply, to just be human.
Filming for “Breastworld” gets started and Michelle Visage jumps on Miz Cracker within seconds to give her notes on how she’s playing her character. But I’m not fully paying attention because the Pit Crew extras in this skit are highly distracting.
Eureka is having a lot of issues with the acting. She shoots Pit Crew hottie Bryce so poorly that he doesn’t even notice he was shot.
Miz Cracker, in particular, is also having a lot of trouble. The notes she’s getting from Michelle and Ross Mathews aren’t really being applied, it seems, and her takes all feel a bit similar.
Speaking of awkward takes, Kameron Michaels has one of the biggest, toughest parts in the group and also struggles with her delivery quite a bit.
But enough about all that. Let’s get to the main stage portion!
Tonight, category is: Silver foxy, an old lady runway!
Miz Cracker is giving us Meryl Streep as Anna Wintour as Danny DeVito. It’s sleek, it’s neat, the massive botoxed lips are clever, but it’s not wholly outstanding.
Asia O’Hara’s look is very different. She’s serving crazy old sitcom grandma who still parties and does weird shit at 85 years old and has no idea what she looks like. I’m not a huge fan of it, but it does tell a great story.
Monét X Change is telling a story too with the IV drip and the saggy boobs and hospital gown. It’s fun, it’s cute, it’s entertaining… But she’s wearing a pussycat wig again! If that.
Aquaria’s look is fierce and fashionable, but it’s not quite aged enough. She explains that her concept is to channel older women who still dress hip and try to look super young, but maybe that’s a mistake given this runway theme.
Eureka is serving sweet old librarian grandma at a fancy affair. She’s having fun with her flowy coat and the facial expressions are a nice touch, but the look is a bit boring.
Kameron Michaels is giving comedy with her jittery old lady who pops pills for jolts of energy. It’s cute, it’s fun, and it’s super realistic.
Time for the finished product to air: it’s “Breastworld!”
Miz Cracker is a bit stiff (again) as Julie, the cruising director. It also hurts her character a bit that we’re unable to tell whether she’s supposed to be a robot or not. But that’s the writing’s fault, really.
Kameron Michaels plays neurotic, horrified, conservative parkgoer Muffy who doesn’t want to be here. It’s not terrible, but she does overact some of the lines a tiny bit.
Aquaria is once again using her slight speech impediment to her advantage by playing a robot with staggered speech. It’s an excellent performance. Also, she looks stun.
Monét X Change is playing Muffy’s more relaxed, fun-loving friend who’s all about getting crazy with the menses. She’s quick, witty, and entertaining—and throws in a lot of ad-libs.
Eureka’s bit is a little scattered, but the final product at least looks a bit better than it was during filming. She still can’t shoot for shit, though.
Asia O’Hara is playing Parah Salin, an obvious parody of that one crazy bitch. She does a great job taking the dialogue and making it her own. It’s a very good performance.
Timeout, though—as a hardcore Westworld fan, I have to say I’m a bit disappointed by this writing. The story of this skit hardly had anything to do with the HBO show, and it felt pretty uninteresting all in all. It’s a boot from me, Mary.
Now for the critiques: Cracker and Kameron have good runways, but poor performances. Aquaria is the opposite. Monét and Asia were pleasing in both aspects. Eureka failed at both.
The girls retreat to the Untucked lounge, where Kameron Michaels is convinced she’s lip-syncing this week. The other ladies see this as some sort of crazy continuation of her subdued reaction to winning last week’s challenge. They think Kameron is channeling Miss Nina Bo’nina Brown and just hating on herself for no reason.
Eureka, thinking there’s a strong chance she might be going home, says some early goodbyes to the queens and tells them how much she loves them. Everybody comes up to hug her.
Miz Cracker gets a beautiful video message from her mom and sister, and she tells everyone about how her mom is slowly going blind and getting on Drag Race this year was one of her last chances to let her mom see her shine as her drag queen self.
What I, however, would like to know is why Cracker is showing less emotion throughout all of this than Kameron. In fact, Cracker turns the moment around as a way to (rather harshly) tell Kameron she should allow herself to be happier.
Kameron walks away mid-conversation. Kameron Michaels, the source of drama? What world are we living in?
Eureka joins Kameron in the outdoor supply closet thing to be there for her. Kameron explains she wishes she’d gotten a message from her mom. She says she got her dislike of emotion and public showings of feels from her dad, who died five years ago. It’s super crappy that the other girls aren’t around to hear this and understand her better, but at least Eureka is there to comfort her.
Back on the main stage, Asia O’Hara is declared the winner of the week.
Aquaria is safe, and so is—gasp—Miz Cracker. This week, Eureka and Kameron Michaels are in the bottom two. The lip-sync song is “New Attitude” by Pati LaBelle. Right away, Kameron is emoting the shit out of the song.
Eureka catches up, though, with a crazy Swiffer split move that cracks everybody up.
And last but not least: Simultaneous splits!!
The lip-sync ends and Ru announces the winner: it’s Kameron. Gay gasp.
But wait! Eureka also gets to stay!
No one is going home this week! This fierce top six is staying put. Yay!
A run-down? On my Drag Race?
Miz Cracker – Cracker came into the competition as my favorite (by far) and she has failed to shine week after week. It speaks to how drastically my opinion of her has changed that I was hoping she’d be in the bottom two instead of Kameron. There is this jarring lack of vulnerability coming from her that makes her really hard to relate to.
Asia O’Hara – I’m not convinced that Asia’s win over Monét this week was fully deserved, but she did do great in the challenge. Asia may well make it to the end of the competition after all.
Monét X Change – I think the only reason Monét didn’t win is because of that damn obsession with tiny-ass wigs. I mean, come on now. The judges have been telling her this week after week. Get some volume up in hurr, woman!
Aquaria – There’s this recurring storyline surrounding Aquaria about how overconfident she is, but I haven’t seen that as that much of an issue in the last few weeks. She was too cocky in the first few episodes, yes, but I think she’s grown a lot already in the span of this competition.
Eureka – Miss Eureka almost went home tonight, but I don’t think RuPaul is willing to let her go. In fact, it’s highly likely that the gal is being eyed for a win. It remains to be seen what kind of finale we’re dealing with, though, because I don’t know if she can win in a lip-sync for the crown.
Kameron Michaels – If you couldn’t tell from this recap, Kameron has now officially become my favorite. She’s wildly creative and while she may not always do well in the acting challenges, she’s clever and resourceful and is consistently underestimated. You go, kween.
That’s it for this week! See y’all next time, hunnies. Kisses!